Captain’s log 

Some of you may know that I’ve been experimenting with fiction for some time now. After a couple of failures trying to write a novel it became apparent to me I had much studying to do before I could even think about trying again. That was two years ago. Now I have a rough draft basically done on this new project that is currently entitled The Needles of Ahuehuete and 106,000 words. I have it set up so that a part 2 is doable as an addition to the novel or sequel whenever I feel like writing it but I also like where and how this one ends too.

Now here’s where you potentially come into the scene: I’m requesting a hand full of copy readers who are willing to go over it and tell me how much it sucks. If you speak spanish that is huge to me right now as the whole book takes place in cental/south America from the first person perspective of an American while travelling. He knows some spanish and has a digital translator on his tablet but it’s not always available for use. Sometimes the protagonist Tommy has only a sliver of an idea what anyone is saying while other times there is a bilingual character that acts as the stories translator and even then there is a language barrier. Since the translation was done with google I can’t even consider doing anything with this until I’ve had someone whose not a gringo verify it all sounds right. It was fun to write this way though I feel like it simulates what the experience is like… although much more dramatically.

Contact me here if interested: Kontakter

What else? Some notes… I have a burning desire to get good at writing fiction. I love the experience of reading a good book that just sucks you in like a black hole and blows your mind. Am I there yet? Oh hell no! But I’m getting closer every time I try. I’m going to keep trying until I can start selling these things and people love them. I like that poetry is something I have no desire to monetize. It’s my place to play and say and do whatever I feel like. And I like that fiction makes me feel the opposite way and gives me a space to potentially create to market. Even if I never sell a single book it’s damn fun trying.

I get sucked into writing almost the same way reading does. I get to create these worlds and live in them before you do. In some aspects that’s what it’s all about… but that wouldn’t be the whole story.

I just finished writing and am planning on going over it once in the next few days, eating a bunch of acid, and then sending out the drafts when I come back. I already have a new idea for another plot/novel and may just start focusing on that depending on the type of feedback I get. 

Genre: Fiction / Sci-fi / Realism

P.s If it takes me a little longer than expected to send these out don’t trip I will get to it soon… there’s not exactly any time frame on this and it’s not like I’m in any hurry… thx

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Antimatter

Did I ever tell you about the time
I ate two hits of acid
& washed it down with a Heineken
while I was in Big Sur
camping by a river with a friend
I thought it would be nice to go
for an afternoon hike while it kicked in
except I never found the trail
there was this droning sound looming
I knew I had to get out of there before
it was too late
something weird was happening
all of a sudden I felt like a sunfish
in the dust
I needed to go to the beach
at first I didn’t understand it
the sheer magnitude of the magnetism
the metal viscosity of my blood flowing
in these two hemispheres
ringing a screaming buzzing making
the connections between all this with
my hands curling up into my chest—
they wouldn’t budge—
I’ve gone retarded from drinking & drugs!
I’ll never be the same!
The acid was bad!

So I tried
& I kept trying
floundering in the Lexus
my hands wouldn’t move
pinned down curlfisted
I could talk & laugh
but there was a black holes force
yanking them into me all the while
I could sense the magnetic fields coming
off of me & my friend laughing hysterically
making fun of me
was I becoming a dolphin—
was this where I transform & go back
into the ocean like an animorph
right here on Pfieffer beach in front of everyone
past the ranger’s booth who took the 5
Did he have any idea what was happening
how was I ever going to get out
open the door & walk to the beach
I had no idea; I was paralyzed—
time was slowly passing though
whatever happened started to die down
right when we got there only so much
that it allowed me to unpry my retarded arms
from my chest but I could still feel this
overwhelming gravity shooting off of me
pulling into me like I’d never felt before
never felt again—
a lesson learned by poison’s collision
with a sacrament—I walked my magnetic ass
down to that beach with a smile so wide
a beluga whale coulda swam thru it
those translucent dark indigo swirls
in the sand from the volcano spun
all around my feet… the crystalline
glistening… the gravity of every step
moving in a cycling system of energy
the fat man in the wetsuits stomach
started beaming transmissions so I lay
with my jeans my black shirt feeling it
between my toes & fingers for hours
I can still hear the waves lapping
from ten years ago
like an aliens tongue at the spiral caves
inside of me I remember I never wanted
to forget it’s sweet eerie steel hissing








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Some unknown

You wake up
holding a glass jar
with a brain inside of a solution
do you stick your hand inside
to touch it slimy & beige
standing on the edge of a butte
or do you go & carry it down
to where the wildcats
are floating dry lips
invisible above the mud
go give it to the sandstone
night at the edge of the laurel
canyon with your sweaty hands
dancing by the fire after sunset
or a bird you’ve never heard before
unravels something inside of you
bringing liquid ripples
replicating sounding impossible
flies away
can you see the stars
with your eyes closed
not thru the Earth
but thru the trees
not until you’ve sweat
the infinite of last winter’s rain
from the high noon heat
lighting up the mountains
cleaning up the wastelands
of pines the beetles left behind
with wildfire awakenings
suddenly everything you thought
you owned
is either in your truck or burned
to the ground—where did the jar go—
you lose grip of the spiral
lightning flinging ’round
your wrist & can’t see
your shadow in the moonlight anymore
carve a message into it
found millions of years later
two words written
barefoot with a staff
of bone & petrified wood
a necklace of teeth
some feline, some human,
some unknown





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Apricots & acorns

I can’t hit
the notes
when my throat
does that thing
I can’t hit
the notes
they’re just
so good
I’ve got somethin’
in me gotta get it out
I’ve got somethin’
in me gotta get it out
gotta get it out
don’t uproot me
again—nothing
looks familiar 
don’t uproot me
until it’s time
to go—I’ll go
I’ve got somethin’
in me like an apricot
I’ve got somethin’
in me like an apricot
an apricot
in my clenched fists
bursting running
down my arms
in my clenched fists
bursting running
down my neck
two pits to be planted
in the dirt
before the mountain
freezes in December
someday
when all the pines have died
we’ll still have apricots
& acorns
we’ll still have apricots
& acorns
X




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Dicks & drugs

You can have
a hard dick
or a slurred tongue
but you can’t have both

Or hey what do I know
maybe you can
I knew a dealer
in New York
who had little blue pills

There’s actually something
I’ve never done
his neighbor told me
it fucked with his head
they both looked at each other
nodded & agreed

He had a couple pit bulls
they were lounging beside him
with their tongues out
as he smiled reminiscing
the fond moment
he was fucking this chick
& put her head thru a wall
verbatim

I could write tragedies
about some that I’ve met
back before there was Weedmaps
when gangster wannabe’s
stood between me
& some moldy catpiss that
hardly took the edge off

But I won’t—

A cock is not just
for playful pummeling & painting
piss murals on everything
a cock is like a barometer
a cock gives you a choice

                 Someday I predict
                 I won’t care as much
                 if I make it another thirty years
                 come smoke me out with sap
                 on the side of the trail
                 on a sunny day
I’ll have had so many
thousands of deafening orgasms
by then—tens of thousands—
it will all seem like one
about to happen

                   







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The seahorse

I wanna go
under there
again
fuck you & all your asphalt
take me back
beyond the shore
beneath the waves
I don’t wanna be a particle
anymore
I don’t wanna be a wave
again
I just wanna burn
burn
burn
these tetrahertz teeth
I just wanna breathe
breathe
breathe
my liquid lungs are glowing
I wanna go
underwater
again
I wanna close
my eyes right open
fuck you & all your pretty sky
take me back out
way beyond the shore
beneath the waves
I’m not gonna be a particle
anymore
I’m not gonna be a wave
ever again
I just wanna burn
burn
burn
in a circle
I just wanna breathe
breathe
breathe
the black water
where the iceberg
meets the seafloor
scraping
in the darkness
the red water
where it bursts
open to magma
exploding
in the






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