Tag Archives: florida

Jeremy 

You were the only one who seemed
to give a shit that I was new
even though in Florida almost everyone
is a transplant at some point
we looked similar in that we were both
tall, skinny, white but darker skinned
with short dark hair
I remember your baggy polo shirt
& skinny scene skater jeans
I could see you probably never
brushed your teeth
you were grimy
hence where you got your nickname
I thought it was so gross you’d wipe
your cigarette ashes all over your jeans
here I am almost 15 years later
wiping joint ashes into my shirt
the last time I saw you it was evident
that the tables had turned
it makes sense, you two have been together
probably like six years now
you’ve been tamed
you’re not hanging out of my car window
doing 120 down the interstate
or throwing quarters
causing a suburban to do a perfect 180
come charging at us full speed
it was a straight up high speed pursuit
you cracked its windshield & we tore
thru peoples yards leaving two long trails
of mud in our wake
we could have died then too or worse
I hid in someones yard but he found us
ripped out his badge said he was a cop
but nothing ever happened
nothing ever did despite it all
I don’t think I was yet aware
of how traumatized I was
your dad was shot & killed
when you were younger though
so I bet you at least had some idea
I have a lot of stark memories
from our friendship, feeling like
I had a brother
you getting so pissed off
I can’t even remember why
throwing your glass bong
& it sticking out of the wall
unbroken just to spite you
rednecks want to get drunk
off Milwaukee’s best at the river
get territorial & start fights
we’d be smoking blunts freestyling
to some beats about how dumb they are
flooring it in reverse in these fields
where the roads ended
spinning round & round
one of those
waterfront developments
built a five story tower on the Manatee
downriver from where I lived
I don’t regret kayaking there at night
shitfaced & on a mission
or during a wildfire with smoke so thick
the sun was just an orange dot
even you who smokes like a chimney
still to this day couldn’t stand it
we went down also ’cause they saw us
we were long gone with the white noise
of the boggy water before they could do anything
besides—what would they do
tell us we couldn’t do
what we’d already done
try to snap our pics
on their flip phones
from the window
of their white escalade
you got a bad ankle
but you still skate
I can hear Panda Bear singing
got to do
what you’ve got to do
what you’ve got to do
what you’ve got to do
what






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Jermz

I’m not entirely sure what compelled us

to joust with our bodies that one day

we made fried rice with psilocybe cubensis

except we didn’t really cook them

I was gagging it down with a fork

I found them in a ranchers cow field

behind the Publix despite a cop parked right at

the exit & seeing him riding a tractor that time

it was weird driving around your older brothers

upscale neighborhood near downtown St. Pete

listening to Omar in the spaceship

flipping a bitch at the sight

of a construction zone—fuck that

skeleton warriors wearing metal armor

with swords began to charge at me

from the shadows of a concrete wall

getting kicked out of a parking garage

smoking a joint no longer able to see them

typical banyan tree weather—hot

humid & sweating, so many little fruit flies

ended their lives with their wings stuck

to my face but not yours—I figured

it was because you’re Cuban

by the long stretch of thick grass

in the bayside park with everyone else

We pumped our mushroom legs thru it

on our bikes full speed toward each other

unyielding playing chicken faster—

faster until we were right about to collide

two dudes over six feet tall careening

with the craziest grins you’d ever seen

our bikes crashed, tangled, your front tire

taco’d & we met midair somewhere around our chests

with an audible exhalation of air

like we knocked the wind out of each other

& went flying toward the ground laughing—

laughing as hard as we possibly could

hysterical & insane dying there in the grass

by death beach with a water bottle

& clouds in the sky rotating color

swirling what—your girlfriend from like

thirty miles away appeared out of nowhere

said she saw us sitting there driving by

we didn’t even know what to do at that point

you left to go hide inside of clothesracks

at a mall with her—I got in my car & drove it

like a squishy pancake over the sunshine skyway

I don’t even know how I did it

cars were shrinking, expanding, & shifting

rapidly between the wiggling lanes all around me

I stayed between them somehow no matter what

I listened to dream sequence & sensory decay II

I told myself if I ever make it

to Anna Maria island I don’t know what I’ll do

it took me an hour but I made it just in time

to walk thru the white sand to the concrete

dock all the way to the end with no one

around just to watch the pastel sky dance

for me like kites being flown from way out

on the ocean with stars turning on like streetlights

the soft sloshing of the sea

.

Close your eyes

                                      You’re a sweet

                                           fractal fucking god

                       you got all your tentacles 

                  I’m in the back seat of the ride

                  laying down with my feet up

                         giggling like an idiot

                                          the power’s out

                              in the whole entire town

                         we’re cruising thru the dark

                                             back to Bradenton

                                 though it isn’t to me

                                    I can’t hear your stupid

                                            sober cartoon voices

                                        except for little bits like

                              gorilla suit this & Wayne that

                              I’m missing the thin warmth

                              of the girl who picked me

                            out of the crowd & stayed

                             in my arms until it was over

                 I wondered if it was the acid

                          we had to go our separate ways

                         tethered by a code of numbers

                                a holloweyed goodbye I can’t

                                     seem to forget—the fractal

                  fucking octopus god just shimmers

       like scales coiling underneath the surface

                        completely unknown to anyone

                              but I see you motherfucker






.


June


We started dreading
Our hair right around
The same time
Even though your roommate
Who was also your best friend
& like an overbearing older
Sister to you said we
Were ruining our hair
Yours always smelled
So amazing from the lush
Soap you’d feel out of place
Traversing through a mall
To get to & was
A little more reddish
Mine were basically just
These nasty lint magnets
That took six hours to dry
I’d tie them back like a hippie ninja
Or up like a pineapple
I’m not a tits man per se
But yours were huge
& beautiful, you were never
Skinny like me
We used to drink
Lip puckering teas outside
Your little bungalow
In St. Pete
The cicadas twisting in the willows
Above the air conditioners
Turning on & off
The same way
They’d eventually disappear
I used way too much vinegar
The first time
It was gross
It always was
Vanilla reminiscent tannins
With an acetic bite
At the back of the throat
Enough to turn the walls
Of your stomach into leather
We threw up in the bush
I went first, I drank the most
Not knowing what to expect
We lit a fire & forgot
About us by it
It was heavy
It was calm
Knowing where cathedrals come from
You had to almost carry me back
To your bed, it was probably
My favorite one of them all



.



The sound of ten toes cracking

With their tires moving thru the rain
I won’t be the one who says you can
You know that your knife’s getting weak
Boy getting weak in your hands
To Beercan island with those old tires moving thru the rain
Into the parking lots of unsuspecting condos

sometimes running on the pavement to the beach
Where shiny new shoes and hammerhead sharks on wheels
wouldn’t dare past a swoop
but we would with our barefeet moving through
the white sand beach between our toes in the night 
Where dreams should have been glowing
there were other ones between our lips
Like little blue stars of the oceans living swirl
in the dark waves lapped the shore of everything was
In the night with our toes moving through the wet sand
We called it Russia like when we were all
over each other by the bonfire it was snow
between the trees growing up from it like a warm forest
where we joined fueled by whatever stars we could fit
in our packs and find by the fire lit
that night glowing galactic & jealous
Living liquid like the ocean into both of you
lapped up the shore glowing
Let’s leave this world tonight
 That aint right
         Yes it is
         Yes it is
         Yes it is

 ‘Cause honestly
I’d rather just wear my blue hoodie
& my underwear I’d rather just
          yes the glowing world tonight
                  sitting there smoking a blunt
             & having an orgasm
                                                      I’m one of
                                           the last poets
                                                ever to live



Brittany

You were the tallest girl I ever fucked—
that alone stands out to me thinking back
among the sea of deviance like a peak in the waves

You must have been my height
or just slightly shorter—I think we even
did a side by side just to see back to back

I remember those legs
but I can’t remember your face now
other than the way I would catch you staring at me from across the room

There at someones party with your semidwarfed boyfriend
in Sarasota from outta town—Tallahassee maybe,
you guys seemed so close

I don’t know why then our hands found
their way into each others
while he was supposedly passed out right beside us—

There was no stopping it at that point—
we were too young or something—too magnetic—
nothing else in the world had any meaning left—

We had been born to find each other
sought out of height—out of hair—
out of the ringing in our hands down into your soaked booty
shorts

I had to taste it—
and soon my cock growing into belonging down in your throat
was no longer enough—

To fuck wildly trying to be quiet
he didnt even move
or make a sound pulling your black wavy hair back
my hand over your mouth in the dark smell of unpeeling
—I remember
loving distinctly how much of you there was—
the same reason we’ll probably be gone
from this world before everyone else—

You told me you’d let me do anything to you
and of course that was a total lie
but it sounded good outside at 4am on the grass beneath the willow—

How were we supposed to know
Rachel’s nana made her the blanket
we desecrated into the dirt with our mad hazy starlit ritual

You told me you loved him but that you needed me—when I came inside you pulled me in as tight as you could—I slept on my own on the couch & saw your myspace three months later still together



Ashley (how I learned I was sadistic)

I thought of you
when I clipped this carabineer
 to my hip

I never really thought you were attractive
probably because you were younger than me
 and blonde

Your hips were wide
but your jeans just kinda sunk
 down into your legs

You came to Florida from Massachusetts
smoked Marlboro reds
 scenecut studbelt blueyed girl

We used to knock down lamp posts
in your half-built neighborhood
 ’cause they were hardly bolted in at all

Sang Where I end and you begin
with the windows open
 stoned & speeding on the way home

After a couple of years 
your old friend Seamus
 came to visit for a week

He was looking for a mindfuck
asking everyone for mushrooms at the party
 ’cause he could never get them back home

Some kid rolled up in a Buick with a paper bag half-full
of fresh pasture picked cubensis
 asking twenty but was talked down to fifteen

He was already wasted
I hadn’t noticed it until then
 but he was also hideously in love

We tried to warn him not to mix the two
but there was no stopping that
 chain reaction of excess

Or maybe we
wanted him to learn
 the hard way

‘Cause when it peaked upon him
for the very first time
 he was brought to his knees

All he could do was profess his undying love for you
in the empty park mindlooping
 sometime after midnight

There kneeling in the thick grass
we sat next to each other
 on the bench amused at this display

He practically vomited that he loved you
and that he always had, over and over,
 like the words were caught in a circuit

“No you don’t, Seamus, shut up, you’re just fucked up.”
You told him
 with a sly smirk and a sideways exhale

Never before, and never again,
my hands were all over your small tits
 and my tongue was in your drunk mouth

We were on fire
and he began to cry
 unable to believe his eyes

The more he suffered
at our feet
 the more we felt alive